Chests, Chests, Chests!

The Rdm thingie going on in the holiday and speciality themed chests is killin me. Killin me! For Halloween this was me:

"Yay! Chests!"
*buy keys*
"I am so gonna get something great! Chainsaw Greatsword HO!"
*opens chest*
"Well it did say a chance."
*opens 24 more chests*
"Maybe I am just unlucky...I will try one more time tomorrow."
*goes to store and buys another gem card*
*Opens 5 more.*
"Why you sons of bitches! Gimmie my Blasted zombie risen slaying ChainsawBlade!!*
*Reads the forums.*
*takes a deep breath*
*throws epic fit that wakes the dogs, sends my family scurrying for 'home invasion' weapons, and nearly costs me a computer*

For the so short, I didn't get a chance to play, Lost Shores:

"Yay? More chests??*
*I will not get upset, I will not get upset, I will not get upset*
"250 for a special chest? Not too shabby."
*buys a chest*
"Here we go!"
*Opens chest*
*gets a damn papaya*
"Well you must not want my money that badly, A-net."



So I have come to the conclusion that chests and the goodies they put into them are not for me. Nope.

They hang the meat of the chests over a pit of flowing lava and spikes. The piteous cries of the minis trapped inside tug at the heartstrings, but alas they will have to rot in there. Because, when all is said and done, I refuse to give them my hard earned money for crap. I have bills for that...

Morgan's Spiral Spanked!

I did that! In one go! *happynakiesdance*

I had watched the guide on Dulfy.net here. It was like watching a beautiful butterfly float along the most dangerous of paths. Graceful and bad ass all in one! They have some great guides and awesome awesome weapon galleries.

Also added Dulfy.net to the blog roll! *grin*

Here is my victory pose:

Bad Ass Bitch! Whoohooooohooooo!

Why I Need a Prosthetic Penis

WARNING: The following post will contain MASSIVE amounts of foul language and bitchery. Please hide the kiddos and help your selves to some beer.

Last night, after at last completing Ascalon Catacombs in Story Mode with my new buddies, I wen to the Straights of Devastation to run the 3 event chain there to get Sia *lev 73 whoot!!* to 80. From no where I get a party invite. Me? Friendly type of peeps I am, I join in.

Big big big big big big mistake. First it is just hey how's you kinda chatter, but one proclaimed 14 then 24 year old male starts whispering me.

*please note I was farming this events and did not get a screen of this convo. By the time I though to do so, I had already logged for the night. Also I have changed leet speak to my form of English. You are welcome.*

Him- Hey, new to guild wars?
Me- Nope old hand at this!
Him- ???
Me- 8 years GW1 and 408 hours in Gw2. You?
Him- Dayumm that is leet! 
Me-  Thank you! I also have a blog. -address- Check it out sometime!
Him- *something about me being a dude making a female toon*
Me- That is because I am female...
Him- Got any pics??
Me- Sure I have a few on my blog.
RED FLAG THERE BUT I FIGURED WTH MY PICTURES ARE ON MY BLOG ANYWAYS.
Him - links broke
Me- Google Trippin Tyria
Him-  There is only one pic of you.
Me- There are more but in past posts.
Him- your pretty!
Me- Thanks! 
Him- Are your boob real?
OHH YOU MUTHER FUCKER! NOT YOU HAVE A GREAT BLOG, NOT COOL GREAT TO SEE YOU ARE A FAN. NOOOO THIS FUCK HAS TO COMMENT ON MY RACK.
Me-Of course.
Him- C's??
Me- No DD. 
Him-  Nice
Me- Thanks...
Him- Spit or swallow? ;)
Me- I have to go. *block*

See the thing here is that sarcasm does not translate into words very well. Yes, I have a rack, I am a chick. Y,es they are nice, my Hunny likes em just fine. NO, I will not apologize for showing cleavage on my blog page, as I am more than my breast size. I am an intelligent hard working woman that loves to game. Alas it is jack-off dick heads like the above that just make the rest of you decent guys look like shit. 

I understand that being immature is a big excuse for this behavior. But when the fuck does immature cross the line to fucktard? See above. 

When the hell is it going to be ok for chicks to be good at games without the whole -wth gtfo cunt- or the every popular -go make me a sammich- shit?

Tell you what...when you flop your dick out online and let people oogle it then maybe just maybe will you fell the slightest glimmer of what it feels like. 

What will it take for some people? A prosthetic dick? Maybe I will get one. You know, so that way I wont be some chick with tits that can suck you off that also has a blog online. Because we all know a woman's worth online. 

FUCK YOU. 

My worth is my own. My gaming is my own. And the only reason you even ask online is because you are too cowardly to go out into the real world and get bitch slapped for your comments. I DARE you to go outside, find a random chick, and first ask her if her boobs are real and then if she swallows. I FUCKING DARE YOU! Let me know when you get out of traction from getting your bones broken.

Finding Home

Like the rest of you I had delusions of grander before GW2 launched. I had my guild page all nice and spiffy, my roster planned out and all my duckies in a row. So excited about getting the old gang back together for a new Tyria. Then real life came by a kicked me square in the ass.

My old gaming buddies? Well I still talk to them, hang out with them online and by text, but it is not the same. Some have left for new games that they love, some have out grown the whole 'gaming thing', while others are working/schooling their asses off. I can't blame them.

I miss them though. These were the people who helped me kill Abbaddon after killing me in a dance off, ran with me through multiple Eye of the North book runs, helped me with dye combos and cheered my armor whoring obsession. They were my first online family, and I miss them with the depths of my heart.

But sometimes loss leads to gains. I've been slow to let go of my pre-launch power plans of mighty ruler ship. A good buddy has taken time away from his guild to come Yak's Bend side to help me out. He had been waxing goodness about his current other guild mates, and I at last gave him the ok to send me an invite. *Crickets chirruping in the guild chat had nothing at all to do with my decision....blush*

Yay! People who talk! Yay! People with crazy sense of humor! HELL YEAH! There be another chick in the chat!!!

So I am going to step away from my planning, wear my sorry $20 Wal-Mart special headphones, and get to know some new peeps. Because sometimes, you have to let go to really have some fun. Well that and speak up a bit, dang my first round shyness...

I Fought a Dragon Toe

I am trying to get Sia at max level so I can get her kitted out and dungeon worthy by Sunday. A full Master Huntsman later she is sitting pretty at level 66. So it was off to the personal story. Tybalt was a hoot! I loved the apples phrase he used when he was Demmi. Lovely apples indeed you naughty charr... And I liked to have really lost it when he charged in and bolted the doors. My apple buddy! I shall miss you!

Whom do they replace him with? A cabbage with a sword gifted to him from the Pale Tree. Where the heck is my sword? Where the heck is my Rally the frickin Troops Speech? Them first born bastards are a talkative lime light steeling bunch of weeds...*sniff* They took my Tybalt my funny funny Tybalt and replaced him with this guy? Time to make a salad! 

After all the gift givings and future walkings were done, it was back to Cla-rw Island for some dragon toe splintering! It really is my first dragon type thingie, not counting the dragon in the sylvari starter instance. It had grubs, it had poison, and I wish I could feel a bit more than a pesky ant pinching my way to victory. Hence le epic camera angle in the last picture. *grin* 

How about the other races personal story lines? And more grit-teeth inducing forced partner changes in the works?

Please tell me that this is an actual ship we can command. Nothing says 'I am a bad ass pirate' better than sailing the Tyrian Seas in the corpse of a dead Mammoth!

Ahh yes we meet again, Toe of the Foe I Cannot See completely!

The best face shot I have of the darn thing that ate my Tybalt. 

First Yay for Healing Spring! Second Yay for not looking so small and tasty in this screen shot!

Post 100

Wow! I was going to do a whole spiel about Halloween and how much I failed at the Mad King's Clock Tower, until I noticed that this would be my 100th post.

Really 100 times? Holy cow I did something and stuck with it! Whooohoooo! *happydance* It has taken me a bit longer to get better than I had thought. I got the flu Thursday before last, and it has really cleaned my clock. The weakness is just now tapering off, and I feel like iv been pounded by charr wielding pool noodles filled with cement. The candy gleaned from my nephews trick-or-treat bags have come a long way in getting my *ohmygodsotasty* appetite back.

I want to thank everyone who comes by and reads the madness that I put forth here. I am a complete nut about GW and love to share my experiences and thoughts about the game with you all. Look forward to another 100 post folks!

Ps: Still not walking anywhere! I love my broom!

Halloween Fun

My rl sister Wicked Aira and me dancing for the Family Sized Candy Corn

Who is a pretty pretty birdie?

The rare frog witch! 

And I think I have worn this costume long enough...its getting funky...

Vanity shot of Lazula....I am in love with her whole look. 

I swear that I am feeling better. The flu really kicked my tukas. My thoughts on Halloween events, the clock tower of arrrgh, and chests coming up tomorrow morn.